Spurs consider a Green choice

It has emerged that Tottenham Hotspur are looking into the possibility of signing West Ham goalkeeper Robert Green as a replacement for the ageing Brad Friedel; and they could get him for free.

The experienced Friedel, who turns 41 in May, has had an impressive debut season at Spurs as the club have forced their way into title contention, but being eight years younger, Green could be a more viable option in the long-term. Tottenham are looking to solidify their position amongst the English elite and therefore want to add to a group of players who can mature together over the next few years.

This could prove to be an attractive option for Green who has seen his former Hammers team-mate, Scott Parker make the same move and become a Tottenham favourite. Parker has been highly-praised for his performances this season, which have helped to make Spurs strong contenders to qualify for the Champions League, a meteoric rise considering he was playing in England’s second tier at the start of the season.

Although Green’s track-record suggests a strong loyalty, having only played for Norwich City and the Hammers, he may wish to test himself at the highest level before retirement. Green, unlike Ben Foster and Paul Robinson, has also expressed a desire to remain involved on the international stage and a move to White Hart Lane could only strengthen his cause. Since his infamous error against the USA at the World Cup, Green’s credibility as England’s keeper has greatly eroded, but whilst he is highly unlikely to displace Joe Hart, he could be a worthy understudy.

If these reasons for a move away were not enough, West Ham are playing hardball over a contract extension to the one which expires in the Summer. Determined not to make the same mistakes as previous regimes, David Sullivan and David Gold are hoping to secure promotion to the Premier League before offering one of their highest-earners a new deal.

Although this seems sensible at first-glance, it could risk losing one of West Ham’s best and long-serving players who would be invaluable to surviving relegation if they were to be promoted next season. Reliable goalkeepers are notoriously hard to identify, even Manchester United have struggled, and Green has certainly proved to be one of the talented few, despite his high-profile mistake.

Contract laws are such that Green could freely speak to Tottenham in the summer, or be offered a move by a European club from now with relation to a free transfer in July. With Monaco also apparently interested in Green, this possibility could not be out of the question.

However, a move to Tottenham seems to be much more likely as it would require little adjustment or relocation and would give Green the opportunity to play at the highest level of European football. Hammers’ fans will be hoping their owners decide to tie him down quickly or they will risk losing yet another star to their bitter rivals.

Follow me @RichMaher93

Hammers make ambitious bid for Kalou

With rumours circulating that West Ham’s move for Nikica Jelavic may have fizzled out, Sam Allardyce has been quick to turn his attentions to yet another high-profile forward; this time in the form of Chelsea’s Salomon Kalou.

It has emerged that Allardyce has proposed a loan deal for the Ivory Coast international, currently at the African Cup of Nations, in order to help boost his attacking options for the remainder of the promotion campaign.

With offers for lesser-known strikers such as Jordan Rhodes already apparently rejected, it seems a rather ambitious attempt, however it delivers a clear statement of intent to the rest of the league, similarly to how the purchase of Kevin Nolan did in the summer.

Allardyce has not baulked at the prospect of bringing high-profile names to less glamorous clubs in the past, managing to lure Youri Djorkaeff, Jay-Jay Okocha and Nicholas Anelka to the Reebok Arena to play for Bolton. Despite West Ham arguably being a bigger club, the lack of Premier League football to offer is likely to repel players of Kalou’s status.

Although it is an admirable effort, which apparently also featured a cheeky enquiry with regards to Florent Malouda, it is highly unlikely to be completed. Although Chelsea would perhaps not be averse to seeing the pair leave, with the arrival of Juan Mata and return of a more mature Daniel Sturridge dramatically reducing the roles of the duo at Stamford Bridge, they are unlikely to accept.

Kalou has rejected a slightly more seductive offer from Olympiakos in the past in comparison to plying his trade in the unforgiving second tier of English football, and with Arsene Wenger a known admirer, he is likely to hold out for a transfer to a team playing at a similar level to his current employers.

A player of Kalou’s mould is certainly needed and would provide a great option to either pair with one of our larger strikers, or to deploy down the wing to add some much need flair, pace and width to our game.

It won’t come as a surprise that Kalou is not likely to join but ‘Big Sam’ must be commended for his efforts and ambition. But with less than a week remaining of the transfer window, it may be time to identify some more realistic targets in order to bolster our front-line.

Follow me on Twitter @RichMaher93

West Ham v Nottingham Forest Preview

Nottingham Forest, similarly to us, had a new, high-profile manager in place at the time of our last meeting, in the form of Steve McClaren, a man who had apparently recently rejected the position to be our boss (for the second time) and had beaten our own Sam Allardyce to the England post, which eventually destroyed his national reputation just a few years earlier. It’s fair to say that a resounding 4-1 victory was rather satisfying.

Steve McClaren quickly abandoned Forest and embarrassingly scuttled back to Holland after more dismal results, a country in which it is inevitable that he is held in a higher-regard considering the joke he has become to the English fans and media. His impressive grasp of the Dutch accent is also cited as a key reason for his return to FC Twente.

In contrast to McClaren’s retreat, Allardyce has managed to stabilise West Ham’s situation and has led us to the pinnacle of the Championship alongside this year’s enemy, Southampton. However, fans have fashionably continued to criticise his style of play, despite its arguable success, and still want more. The increasingly irritating notion of the ‘the West Ham way’ is continually used as an argument to suggest Allardyce is not suited to guide us to success.

In my nine years as a season-ticket holder, I have never seen this so-called ‘West Ham way’ in action, perhaps with the exception of a brief period under Gianfranco Zola, but this arguably represented the Italian’s ideology rather than some kind of natural style of football which inhabits Upton Park. It’s often flattering to hear this myth in the media but when our own fans become deluded into believing it, it can cause some discontent.

Admittedly, our victories since the Forest game have rarely been so emphatic, but they are still victories; something we’ve been unable to produce consistently for many years. Even Alan Pardew’s team that got promoted was infamous for its inability to turn draws into wins.

Brendan Rodgers’ Swansea City are the latest club to grab the imagination of the Premier League leading to sycophantic stories and reports about their style of play covering every back page and every pundit’s script. It’s certainly a proud moment for the club, as it was for us when we captured the attention of everyone back in 2006 and for that brief success with Zola; however, we now know from experience that it never lasts long.

Blackpool were the equivalent of Swansea of last year and look where they are now. Realistically, Swansea have a better chance of surviving this season than Ian Holloway’s Tangerines did last term, but it won’t be long until the Welsh side hit hard times. With Allardyce in charge, it’s possible that we won’t become the team that has everyone drooling over passing statistics, but we are also unlikely to come crashing down as Blackpool did, and as Swansea will.

This pessimistic view does not begrudge the Swans of their time in the limelight, it’s always nice to have that team who romantically rise to the top against all the odds and beat the likes of Arsenal. In fact, this January has been a very romantic month for English football, especially considering the lack of major transfer activity; it has seen the return of Thierry Henry to Arsenal, who glamorously netted the winner on his debut, and also Paul Scholes to Manchester United who likewise scored upon his return.

It makes a change for West Ham to be exempt from this coverage. The past decade has seen relegations, promotions, takeovers, three trips to the Millennium Stadium, the signings of international superstars and the departure of Tony Carr’s golden age. The less extravagant nature of the modern West Ham can be seen as a little boring and depressing, but you can be sure that if we keep up these consistent modest victories we’ll be back in the headlines for the right reasons, and back in the Premier League.

You may despise Stoke for their style of football but I’m sure you would accept being 8th in the Premiership at the moment and that is the impressive position in which they currently stand. With Allardyce in charge, there is no reason that we cannot match this gradual success, and perhaps build on it with a little more swagger than the Potters.

The likes of Youri Djorkaeff, Nicholas Anelka and Jay-Jay Okocha were added to the solid foundations of Allardyce’s Bolton team and gave it the flair and exuberance which led to a League Cup final, Europe and becoming a regular member of the Premier League. It is only since Owen Coyle has tried to dismantle Sam’s foundations in exchange for more attractive football that Bolton seem to be losing their grasp on Premier League status. Coyle’s Bolton are yet another team who the media were briefly in awe of last season and have dumped now that their ‘open and expansive attack’ has predictably turned into a weak and frail defence.

I have no doubt that Allardyce is looking to add that flair to our squad in this transfer window, and that he will continue to do so in transfer windows to come, in which we will hopefully have Premiership football to offer. But Allardyce’s management is built on a solid base, and that means 1-0 victories are Sam’s plan for his first season in charge and his struggle to get us out of the second tier. An addition of quick and skilful players this month would certainly help to give us the edge of champions and make us a more attractive side to watch; but if we trudge to another one goal victory today, I for one will be more than happy.

Why the 'Rooney Rule' should not be introduced in England

Of course in our country, the name Rooney only triggers the thought of one man, that being Wayne; arguably our best footballer for many years. However, in America the name Rooney is most prominently associated with Dan Rooney, the chairman of the NFL’s diversity committee and owner of the Pittsburgh Steelers whose rule (‘The Rooney Rule’) forces football teams to interview an ethnic minority as a candidate for senior roles within their club. The name ‘Rooney’ could soon have similar connotations in the English game.

American lawyer Cyrus Mehri, a key figure in the implementation of the Rooney Rule in the USA, arrived in London recently to discuss a possible system of a similar nature being enforced in English football. The PFA’s chief executive, Gordon Taylor, of course backed the idea in the politically correct fashion in which you would expect; but is this really a good idea? I don’t think so.

The issue with regards to this rule is; is it really necessary? People can speak of inherent racism remaining within our country as much as they like but as far as I’m concerned it is obvious that football does not suffer from it. The amount of black players in the Premier League for example, shows that there is categorically no discrimination as 24% of the Premiership’s players are black whilst only 3% of the country is.

However, of course this issue is about management where, admittedly, the figures are rather disproportionate. The only black managers currently in professional work in England are Chris Powell, the boss of Charlton, and Chris Hughton, of Birmingham City (who is actually mixed race). This is odd but is it really through a lack of opportunity which the advocates of this rule try to convince us of?

Other former black managers who spring to mind are Paul Ince and John Barnes. Paul Ince was handed the Macclesfield Town job and, after impressing, was quickly promoted to MK Dons. Here he had a successful spell with a 60% win record and led the Dons to the Football League Trophy and to becoming League 2 Champions. As an exciting, young manager, it wasn’t long until the Premiership clubs began sniffing around him, despite the fact he’s black would you believe!

He couldn’t resist the lure of the top tier of English football and so decided to ditch his lower league club and was appointed by Blackburn Rovers in the summer of 2008 to become the first black manager in the league. However, his story goes rather downhill from here as a miserable run of 11 defeats saw him sacked by the end of the year. Did this have anything to do with the colour of his skin? Of course not, it was a just a run of poor form in an infamously results-based industry. Ince was even given the chance to return to MK Dons the following summer however he eventually decided to leave again and was consequently signed by Notts County. Here he lost a record 9 games in a row and left the club by mutual consent. Again this was because he failed in his job, not because of the colour of his skin.

John Barnes is perhaps an even more obvious example of a manager who was given an opportunity but failed and is now out of the game. Despite the statistics with regards to black managers, Barnes was handed a shot at one of the biggest jobs in Britain; Celtic. His team were ridiculed for how badly they performed under him and suffered a shock Scottish Cup defeat to the hands of Iverness Caledonian Thistle leading to him being duly fired. After a short-spell as boss of Jamaica, Barnes indicated he wished to return to club management and despite his previous failures, he was appointed by Tranmere Rovers. His time there was disastrous and he was sacked after just two wins from eleven games.

This is not in any way suggesting that all black managers will be failures, it simply shows those who have been given opportunities that, if what supporters of the ‘Rooney Rule’ suggest was true, they never would have. There have been other black managers in England including Viv Anderson (also the first black man to be capped by England), Luther Blissett, Leroy Rosenior and Keith Alexander. Suggestions of a ‘glass ceiling’ in place for black managers did arise when the latter two began to become more successful in the lower leagues, but of course Ince’s appointment by Blackburn smashes these accusations.

Chris Hughton and Chris Powell were both appointed as managers this year. Had the Rooney Rule been in place everyone would’ve been praising it for its progress whereas, infact, neither has needed the Rooney Rule to earn their positions. Instead they can receive the credit for working hard and ignoring the manufactured idea of managerial discrimination.

Powell’s namesake, Hope Powell, who is also black, is the manager of England women, and has held the position since 1998. Again this shows football has not hesitated to include, and maintain, a black manager when he, or she in this case, is of the right calibre. Why should clubs have to interview ethnic minorities if they are not of the right calibre? It is a waste of everyone’s time and could be depriving a more deserving manager the time of a club’s chairman, regardless of his skin colour.

With the amount of money being thrown around in football at the moment, I can guarantee that no chairman would hesitate to appoint a black, or Asian manager if he thought that it meant bringing success to his club. Chairmen look for potential and success; not skin colour.

Mehri has eccentrically claimed that the lack of black football managers in the Premier League is “like putting poison right through society”. However the only matter of racism is coming from Mehri himself as he is making an issue out of something which is essentially not a problem and infecting the media with it in an attempt to broker another deal for himself and add another big achievement to his CV. If the rule is enforced it will be he who gets the credit for black managers breaking into the game, not the likes of Hughton, Ince and Powell.

In a ‘Martin Luther King’ fashion speech, Mehri has described himself as a “catalyst for change”. However no comparisons, however minimal, can be drawn with this situation and the time when King was campaigning for his dream. At that time federal action was required, but we must hope that no senior official in football considers himself a potential John F Kennedy as the ‘Rooney Rule’ would only cause more damage than progress.

At a time when we have reached the stage where most see skin colour as irrelevant, why would you separate the minorities from the majority all over again? This act of positive discrimination is insulting to white people in the sense that it suggests they believe they are a ‘superior race’ and also embarrassing for black people and other minorities, who wouldn’t like the idea of receiving special treatment and being separated from the rest of society again.

Do I hope that there are successful black managers in English football in the future? I don’t really care. As much as I don’t care that there are currently more managers from Glasgow than those from England; I’m surprised someone hasn’t made a conspiracy theory about that. Whether the Premier League has 20 white managers, 20 black managers or half and half, as long as our league is the best in the world I will be content that each and every person is doing his job.

5 of the best England vs. Wales meetings

November 16th 1966: England 5 – 1 Wales

Jack and Bobby Charlton became the last siblings to score for England in a single game as the World Champions thrashed their neighbours in an emphatic 5-1 victory. World Cup final, hat trick hero Geoff Hurst had put England 2-0 up before Wales pulled one back, however the Charlton brothers struck either side of an own goal to complete the convincing victory.

May 31st 1977: England 0 – 1 Wales

This famous Welsh victory marks their first, and so far, only win at Wembley Stadium. England’s most-capped player, Peter Shilton brought Leighton James down in the box and gave him the opportunity to covert the resultant penalty to the delight of the travelling fans. The result was quite a shock for an England side sporting the likes of Phil Neal, Emlyn Hughes and Kevin Keegan. Fabio Capello will be glad Wales didn’t double that win tally at Wembley last Tuesday.

May 17th 1980: Wales 4 – 1 England

The ironically named Mike England got off to a flyer in his eight-year spell as the Welsh national manager as his side stunned Ron Greenwood’s England team, who had taken the lead early on, by cruising to a 4-1 triumph. Leighton James yet again returned to haunt England with one of the goals whilst it was a day to forget for Liverpool legend Phil Thompson as his comical own-goal completed the embarrassing defeat in the friendly at the Racecourse Ground in Wrexham.

May 2nd 1984: Wales 1 – 0 England

England’s next visit to the Racecourse Ground was just as fruitless as the previous as an impressive Welsh side boasting the likes of Joey Jones, Neville Southall and Ian Rush battled their way to a 1-0 success with debutant Mark Hughes netting the only goal of the tie in the 17th minute. Wales held on for the rest of the game, against a relatively inexperienced England team led by Bobby Robson, to win the match which proved to be the final Wales and England meeting in a Home Nations Championship.

October 9th 2004: England 2 – 0 Wales

An attacking Sven Goran-Eriksson England team, featuring a front three of Jermain Defoe, Michael Owen and Wayne Rooney comfortably overcame a worryingly weak Wales side, this time managed by Mark Hughes. Rio Ferdinand was recalled following his eight-month ban for missing a drugs test and Frank Lampard gave England the lead inside the first five minutes at the Millenium Stadium, but in typically spectacular style it was David Beckham who stole the headlines. In the second half his stunning, trademark curling strike from outside the area flew past goalkeeper Paul Jones to secure the victory. Beckham’s reckless booking was also later revealed to have been a deliberate stunt to earn him a suspension in a game he would’ve missed through injury anyway, sparking outrage amongst some of football’s leading bodies.

Post-Parker Panic Passes

For the last few seasons West Ham’s existence without Scott Parker would’ve been predicted disastrous. On numerous occasions he has turned in yet another superb performance of gritty enthusiasm to haul the Hammers out of the most depressing situation and secure some much-needed points. It’s fair to say life without the Hammer Of The Year of the last three seasons would be the end of an era at Upton Park as he rapidly ascended from popularity to almost legend status amongst the likes of Sir Trevor Brooking, Paolo Di Canio and perhaps even Bobby Moore, however, judging by yesterday’s winning performance at the City Ground; the post-Parker era could be much more fruitful than expected.

There were no urgent questions as a result of Parker’s absence as by drafting the exciting young prospect of Jack Collison into the centre of midfield, Allardyce was still able to utilise his so-far favoured formation of a 4-5-1. It’s fair to say Allardyce’s managerial counterpart, and former competition for the Hammers job, Steve McLaren needs to be a lot more active before the transfer deadline slams shut on Wednesday as, with the centre-midfield duo of George Boateng and Jonathan Greening having a combined age of 67, an investment for more youthful exuberance is required. No one could begrudge McLaren for cowering under an umbrella this season if Nottingham Forest’s home form continues in this manner. With the City Ground being labelled as something of a fortress with Billy Davies at the helm, Forest appear to have taken a few steps backward under McLaren who’s pitiful defending would’ve discouraged the most optimistic of fans from describing them as promotion contenders.

The manner in which West Ham took the lead appeared effortless as, although perhaps on the back foot for the early part of the game, one of Matt Taylor’s trademark whipped crosses was nervously misdirected by Luke Chambers into the back of Lee Camp’s net; not the first time a West Ham dangerous delivery has resulted in an fortuitous own goal this season. The Hammers added this goal to their momentum rather than simply sitting back as a certain Avram Grant may have done in the past. Captain Kevin Nolan doubled the lead after, despite being infamously dangerous in the six-yard box, he was given enough room to re-direct Tomkin’s header from a corner in the back of the net with the Forest defence standing stationary and stunned. Nolan performed his joyful chicken dance and the Hammers continued to enjoy the control of the game.

Allardyce had a couple of scares in terms of conceding as he marched up and down, just outside his technical area in a rather rebellious and arrogant manner, with Green parrying Lewis McGugan effort away being the most prominent. But it was clear who was going to be the more ruthless in front of goal as Carlton Cole continued a decent run of form as the lone striker by tripling the lead from close-range; again as a result of the corner. Although McLaren’s side’s defending can be almost as much to blame, Allardyce’s famous set-pieces have given West Ham a completely new outlet of goals which they have lacked in recent years, and in turn, the ability to score much more effective away from home.

Substitute Joel Lynch’s impact on the left hand side gave Forest a little more danger and a low cross was eventually converted by Robbie Findley to give the home team a glimmer of hope and pride, especially after their epic comeback to draw with Sven Goran-Eriksson’s Leicester a few weeks earlier. However New Zealand international Winston Reid quickly dispelled any ideas of a similar drama by adding the fourth to West Ham’s tally, yet again from a corner, and finishing the match as an impressive 4-1 victory for the Hammers, who’s away form is become increasingly renowned and feared throughout the league.

McLaren looked rather taken aback at the end of the game as West Ham appeared to have strolled to victory emphatically without ever really reaching the pinnacle performance which the quality of squad they have suggests they can. Allardyce’s business in the transfer market cannot be questioned as Nolan’s presence in the box gives the rather unpredictable and inconsistent, although sometimes extremely effective Cole the much needed support in terms of goal-scoring in this formation, whilst Matt Taylor’s delivery was simply a class above the division he is playing in.

Away from home there appears to be no problems, with or without Parker, but the addition of Sam Baldock earlier in the week will do wonders for home form as it allows Allardyce to pair him with any of his three larger strikers, Cole, John Carew and Freddie Piquionne and give the team much more of a dominant look at the Boleyn Ground. As for Parker he may have been flicking backwards and forwards from the West Ham game on Sky Sports to ESPN’s coverage of Tottenham 5-1 defeat to Man City and be thinking; maybe I’m needed more at White Hart Lane. Perhaps Parker’s absence lifted a shadow of inadequacy from the rest of the players, and although I’m sure the whole of West Ham would like to thank him for his undeniable magnificence and loyalty over the past few seasons, its clear Allardyce’s side can make do without him and maybe even improve without the intense and monotonous speculation he brings.

West Ham vs. Blackburn Preview

It’s quite absurd as to how Avram Grant remains in a premier league job. Now, even Osama bin Laden has been terminated before Grant’s contract. The American authorities had searched tirelessly for almost ten years before finally tracking down their target, whilst Grant has been on show at Upton Park for the last nine months, sporting an embarrassing league record of a mere 20% win ratio, must we remind our owners that they have the ability to eliminate him? Perhaps in bin Laden’s killer we have finally found someone more ruthless than the acrimonious Karen Brady.

British football experts continually convince English clubs that they must continually adhere to the manager they have appointed, stating the few obvious case studies of David Moyes, Arsene Wenger and most notably Sir Alex Ferguson as examples of the fruits of long-term leadership. What they fail to recognise in the case of West Ham United is that, instead of appointing a young, enthusiastic, inspiring candidate wielding previous honours and success, such as that of the three names mentioned above, our owners somehow saw it fit to employ the dull, inadequate and recently relegated; Avram Grant.

It seemed rather strange of David Gold, at the time of the appointment, to describe Grant as someone who had “been there, done that and got the T-shirt”, when in fact, his Portsmouth side, albeit with a points deduction, had already sunk into the second tier of English football. In fact, his record with Portsmouth was even worse than it currently is with West Ham, so to blame their relegation on this penalty would be ridiculous. David Sullivan also agreed with his co-owner at the time, claiming; “we have taken our time over this appointment and are certain we have got the right man”. Perhaps this is the perfect statement to epitomise how much our owners actually know about football.

At the time, Gold also added that “the bottom line is the relationship between the manager and the chairman is critical. In our case it’s two chairmen so it’s even more difficult as you need to have a relationship between three people”. It is now evident that what Gold actually meant by this statement is that by handing the position to an innocuous, lifeless excuse of a manager, there was enough room for him, and Sullivan, to squeeze their inflated egos onto the scene.

Prior to the Manchester City game, the frustratingly irritating Sullivan couldn’t resist the attention of opening his mouth once again by announcing that the Hammers only have a “25% chance of staying up” and labelling the players “spoilt”, claiming most of them are more interested in “where they will be next season” than keeping West Ham in the premiership. Sullivan certainly has a warped view of motivation if he believes deeming the players fickle mercenaries will give them the inspiration to battle for some much needed points.

And then, in an act of comical hypocrisy, Sullivan (and Gold) failed to show at the City Of Manchester Stadium, justifying their disloyal absence with the impact of “watching our poor away performances week after week”. If his comments were not rich enough, he went on to compare his motivational skills to that of Winston Churchill. It’s no wonder as to why he was unable to secure the services of an established, dignified manager in Martin O’Neill in January, as he continues to embarrass himself, and thus the club, with these sporadic outbursts.

It’s also worth noting that Sullivan stated; “I do think that a manager needs that fear factor. You look at Alex Ferguson, Arsene Wenger and Jose Mourinho. The players are a little bit frightened of them”. Obviously he completely ignored this belief when he appointed Grant as, with the omission of his eerily zombie-like demeanour, he would fail to strike fear, or any emotion for that matter, into anyone.

Even Demba Ba admitted that, in the brief February period in which we began to consistently win some games that “we had a new team … and other teams were surprised by us. Now they know how to counter us”. Clearly even Grant’s players recognise that he is tactically inadequate and that, even in the very few games he has won, it was not his ability as a manager but the fact he was able to spring a few new faces upon his opponent, before their traits were identified, assessed and countered by genuinely Premiership-quality managers, and it was back to square one.

Grant has tried to use this hopeless tactic all throughout the season, meaning West Ham have used more players than any other squad in the Premier League. Quite astounding considering the lack of depth in quality we have in some departments. Seeing Grant’s notebook fall apart and flutter around the pitch in Manchester last Sunday was quite symbolic of a man whose plans have completely crumbled. Seeing his hopeless attempt to collect them back together was perhaps even more significant in suggesting the lack of answers he has to the undeniable problems.

Seeing the emotion and joy on the faces of Norwich fans on Monday evening, following their promotion, sparked wonderful, nostalgic memories of our play-off success in 2005. However, it also provoked the epiphany of the immense value of premiership status, and the fact that at the moment, we are sickeningly throwing it away. Surely, whether he completes this demolition of another premiership club or not, Grant will be fired and disappear into the wilderness, as bin Laden did all those years ago. Inevitably he will never again have the chance to manage a premiership club, not that he was ever capable or worthy of doing so in the first place.

Grant’s career will be reflected on in bewilderment, as it was effectively based on absolutely nothing. However, I still believe that the team will remain in the premier league due to fortuitous fixtures, the incompetence of those around us and the personal brilliance of the likes of Scott Parker. That will leave us with yet another summer rebuilding job which must be done correctly this time. Where it leaves Grant is debatable, with a football director’s role rumoured to be lined up at Chelsea, he could unbelievably stroll into yet another lucrative contract. Grant’s secret is certainly beyond me, it’s certainly not his charisma or his ability, but as long as he’s nowhere near West Ham United next season, I’ll be a happier man, and so will 34,000 others.